ONE MORE PIC!!!!

I LOVE ME SOME HIM......SOMETIMES..LOL

I_DELICIOUS

THIS IS HOW I FEEL SOMETIMES........ LITTLE IS REALLY KNOW ABOUT THE ARTIST OF THESE PAINTINGS BUT I DO HAVE THE WEB SITE (OVER 50 PAINTINGS) AND YOU TELL ME WHICH GIRL DO YOU IDENTIFY WITH? PAINTALICIOUS.ORG THE PAINTINGS OF LESIA C.

MICHEAL

as for me......im very upset about micheal jacksons passing it seems so surreal to me that hes gone.....and for those naysayers who view him as a pedophile, a freak, or whatever they wanna call him remember.....no man is without sin.
What a lot of people dont understand is that micheal himself was a victim of child abuse(not to justify ANYTHING!!!) But in our community sexual abuse is swept under the rug and forgotten about ,except by the victim. if micheals story didnt tell us anything remember to listen to your children,nieces,nephews,grands,neighbors and most of all our instincts around certain people.

by the way micheal:::
i cried when my dad told me ben was a mouse....RIP DADDY AND MICHEAL!!!!!!

exes:::

ok ok ok in a very carrie bradshaw-esque kinda way im gonna have to as this question.......

am i the only woman on the planet who is jealous of her mates past relationships?

am i the only one who wishes she would just go away?

not just her name and number but her existence in any form????(too harsh?)

well i dont care!!!!! lol

i just want him to forget....Her hair, Her eyes, the way she moved,

the way they would share intimate moments together ,how she held his heart in her hands ,and how she used those same hands to crush it???

And ultimately how he tells you every other second he gets how wrong she did him?

for his sake i would want to erase any memory of her, and how i want to say to her that im upset that she did that to him and how im picking up the pieces of his broken heart....and shes horrible!!!!!

but then i think....

hes kinda holding on to this pain like a crutch in a sense ..

ex:"i was in love before and shes ruined me, im not ready to say certain things now cause im damaged i wanna protect my heart this time"

say what ???negro?!

then i have to ask the question: in relationships are we all playing second-fiddle?

george....

well heres my first official blog!!! And i welcome those who the world has forgotten....

defining moments in our lives: a wedding? a funeral? a birth?

let's get a bit more intimate: first kiss? first love? first time?

for me it was the first time someone said i was BEAUTIFUL.

its not like i wasnt told before that i was pretty ,but beautiful????

i was astounded!!!

it was by this boy named george ( i was 12) he had a serious crush on me..

he would bring me flowers, teddy bears, and valentines (awwwwww, i know)

i was not impressed...

not because i didnt like him but i was too concerned with people on my block who said i shouldnt like him.

because he didnt dress nice or didnt have a lot at home, and i being in the position of someone who was always picked on ,i shunned him....(i know i know but i was 12 and that was just something else they would ridicule me for)....

so i didnt like him and not realizing that i too was in the same pigeon-hole as he and he could easily come out of his hole with a lil bit of tweaking the clothes, hair and shoes but sadly, for me i wouldnt be so lucky.

my alterations would neither make me normal or accepted..
im what you would call the perpetual ugly duckling!!!
i was in a house fire at the age of 1 and been scarred pretty severely on my hands and little on my forhead ( bangs are amazing!!!!!)


and i guess i watched a little too much t.v. to think that the world was my oyster
and no matter what the pearl looked like i would flourish...that i was special.
but then life taught me a cruel lesson about just being yourself...
not everyone lives by the same mantra and different is weird,scary,funny,and overall noone wants to be different.and i never wanted to accept the life i was chosen and i wanted to be like everyone else...sorta.

back to george ...
i saw him a few years and kids later and he looked amazing( the other ugly duckling)married i might add....
i did feel bad about how i treated him and not because he looked AMAZING!!!!!
he asked if i would keep in touch via facebook and i said sure!!
now at my age im still looking for that george, some who liked me no matter what and didnt care what anyone thought.
as far as he goes i dont feel like i missed out i feel like i have a destiny to fulfill
and if george wasnt a part of the master plan facebook will do....

its my first post as a blogger im trying desperately not to screw this up and for those who have just started to read my blogs let me inform you that im one tough cookie.... as you will see as my blog posts get more interesting by the day....why godiva ?you ask ....well im sweet ,chocolate ,and a naughty after dinner treat or if your just in the mood for some chocolate....here i am .